Control

Photo by: Peter Constantinople

Photo by: Peter Constantinople

Fun fact: Many of my blog posts are inspired by my personal journal entries. Oftentimes, when I’m working on a particular theme in my own life, I will just simply write its name at the top of my journal page and jot down any stream of conscious thoughts that come through while shifting my awareness solely to that theme. Most often, I will use that journal entry to inform the blog I write that week.

However, this week, I’m sharing my thoughts on control. So, I thought it was fitting to not be controlling with my writing - no edits, no add-ons, no adjustments to words or sentences - and instead, lean into the flow and share my exact journal entry (word for word, punctuation for punctuation).

Keep scrolling to read my steam of conscious thoughts about control, and to receive some questions to ponder about control and its role in relationships:

Self-control - where does it come from? Fear of lack. “If I don’t control myself, who knows what will happen. If I keep myself ‘in check’ then I can control the outcome.” Controlling is all fear-based, all lack of personal power based. And really, lack of personal honor based. We awe and admire water and its fluidity, yet, when we are fluid, and not locked down in control mode like stone, we freak. Why do we, and how can we, admire fluidity outside of ourselves, but not honor and admire the fluidity within? When facing control head-on you must go deep within, to the dark corners, and ask yourself the tough questions. Control is always in relation to something - ourselves, another, a physical thing (like money). So, when working with control, it’s also important to partake in relationship work, as well. Who are you in a relationship? How are you in a relationship? Does it matter who or what it is that you are in relationship with? What about you in relationships is working for you? What isn’t? How do you try to control your relationships? Where could you be more discerning? What have you learned about being in relation with others that can inform you about being in relation with yourself? Don’t be afraid to ask yourself the hard questions here, and give yourself the hard answers. That’s the only way that you will shift your existence around control.